#2011 Owen Wilson

This afternoon I went to McDonalds, as I often do, to get drinks for my friends at work. I ordered two large unsweetened iced teas with lemon and a medium Diet Coke. I got to the pay window and the lady there asked me if I had ordered the two unsweetened teas with added lemon and the medium Diet Coke. I said yes and gave her $3.24. She told me to move along to the next window.

I sat at the next window for a few minutes, then the guy slid open the window, went to hand me a drink and squealed, "Oh my God! It's Owen Wilson!" He was kind of freaking out. I looked over to see if something interesting was happening somewhere nearby, like maybe Owen Wilson was coming out of the Starbucks across from the McDonalds, but no, he wasn't. I turned back to the McD's guy and said, "What? And I need a cup holder."

Flustered, the McD's guy said, "Oh okay, I'll get you one," and slammed the window shut. A moment later he opened the window and handed me a cup holder with two drinks lodged in it. He said really fast, "Here you go. I thought you were Owen Wilson. You look like him. You know the movie You, Me and Dupree? He has that blond hair?"

I said, "Yeah, I know who Owen Wilson is. No, I'm not him. And I'm missing a drink there."

McD's guy is still totally flustered and grabs a large drink that is sitting in front of him, jams it in the cup holder and sort of forcefully thrusts the cup holder out the window to me. I look at it for a second and I can see there are no dang lemons in that tea, but I'm shook, so I just leave.

I drive back to work, talking to myself the whole way back to the office about how I need to get a haircut if people think I look like Owen Wilson and how I know that none of those darn drinks are gonna be what I ordered. Sure enough, that's not a Diet Coke, it's a Dr. Pepper. Those unsweetened teas have no lemon AND they are sweet teas. Overall McDonalds fail.

Of course I had to Google a pic of Owen Wilson from that movie.

This is Owen Wilson in a still from the movie You, Me and Dupree.

This is me in my car today, probably looking like I looked as I was trying to get drinks at the McDonalds drive-thru.

This is probably what I looked like after the McDonalds dude told me I looked like Owen Wilson.

And really...would Owen Wilson be driving around an older model Ford Fusion in Bountiful, Utah? 

Doubtful.

I had to do a side-by-side comparison of me and Owen. You decide.