Here's the thing: I'm ready to go back to work full time. Last week I worked part-time, just four hours a day, and it's not really enough to get me feeling like I'm part of the group with anything to contribute. Right now, I'm feeling like I'm half-assing everything I do. When I'm at work, I'm working, but then I leave. I come home and do the PT on my knee, but that hasn't been going so well, either.
A quick update: on Thursday night at the physical therapist's office, I was only able to pull 119 degrees, and that was pulling as hard as I could. He encouraged me to rest and try again, but on the second pull, I could only get to 116 degrees. GRRR I'm pretty sure manipulation is in my very near future.
Even though I'm scared as hell about the manip, (that's what the surgeon's nurse called it), and the ensuing pain it is guaranteed to cause, I'm ready to move on. I want to bend and I just want this knee to feel better. It's like I said above, I feel like I'm just right on the edge of being better and just treading water. I want to go over to the feeling better side!
I'm meeting with the surgeon tomorrow morning, and we will decide then and there if I should have the manipulation, and we will schedule it if he feels I should have it. I'll let you know.
In the meantime, there are things that I will miss about being home. This is the dumbest thing to say, but one thing I will truly miss is watching The Ellen Degeneres Show every afternoon. I love Ellen. I like her style and her sense of humor. I like the way she interacts with her guests, whether they are movie stars or little kids. I like that she likes animals. I like that at the end of each of her shows, she says, "Be kind to one another." I love that she dances a little bit on every show. I think you should dance a little every day. It's good for the soul.
The late Jim Valvano said that you should do three things every day: laugh, think and cry. I do my thinking at work or when I'm just hanging out. Ellen gives me a good laugh every time I watch, and I usually cry a little too. God, I sound so stupid. I'm sorry; please bear with me. It's just that when Ellen does nice things for regular people, I think it's nice and I get a little teary. I like it when people are nice. And I like it when the people who receive stuff and so incredibly happy.
Today Ellen had a cute little boy on the show who wanted to sing a Nicki Minaj song. There was a YouTube video of this boy crying because he couldn't sing the song. Ellen let him come on her show and sing his little heart out. He was so stinking cute, I couldn't stand it. (See why I have to go back to work?!)
Ellen also made me smile today because her guest was Colin Farrell. I have always thought that this guy is HOT. I like the way he talks, the way he looks, and I loved the way he interacted with Ellen. They were flirty! I will go see Seven Psychopaths just because he's in it, plus it looks funny and T is into it.
I think my IQ just dropped 20 points with this post. I should not be so involved with TV. And now, I think I'll go watch a NetFlix episode of Once Upon a Time. (hahahaha!) No, really. That's what I'm going to do.