#1702 (non) foodie Friday

Happy July everyone!

I've been feeling like a bad food-preparer-of-the-family lately. I've been keeping myself busy in the evenings with going to the gym or to RBG, and I haven't been cooking very often. I know that MT and T and grown-ass men, or nearly so, but it makes me feel bad when they are scavenging for food to have for dinner. Truthfully, if they really looked for it, there is always plenty of stuff in the house to eat, but some of the foods we have on hand require more preparation than they are willing to do. I shouldn't feel bad about that, but I do. It affects me too. When I don't cook, I don't have leftovers to take to work for lunch then I end up not taking anything and going out, or taking something from home that I might not really be in the mood for.

After giving this dilemma some thought, I decided that I should try to prepare some meals on the weekends that can be cooked in the slow-cooker or warmed up easily on the stove or in the microwave. A couple of years ago I bought a cookbook with make-ahead recipes and there are a jillion ideas out there on Pinterest. It would be pretty easy to make double batches of stuff that we eat regularly like tacos or spaghetti.

Since I've got an extra day to play with this weekend, I have set a goal for myself to look for some recipes that I would like to eat (and therefore prepare) and make a couple of things on Sunday and/or Monday. It will require some planning and prep, but I think it will be worthwhile. MT would be willing to heat food up in the microwave. I'm not sure about the man-child. I guess he'll do it if he doesn't want to part with his money to feed himself. :)

July is an odd-numbered month, so I plan to write every day. Hopefully I will have interesting things to say most days. I don't have too many things planned for the month, like trips or cool events, but I do have lots of things that I'd like to do written in my spiffy new planner pages.

Talk to you tomorrow!

~~~~~~

I read this book! Check out the 2016 Reading List page.

#1691 weight watcher Wednesday

Here's what I know: sometimes it can be really tough to come up with things to write about. With that in mind, I'm thinking of having a theme for each day of the week that I can use when I don't have a story or some pics to share. I've kind of been moving in that direction for a little while with Simple Pleasure Monday. I've done Travel Tuesday a couple of times. There's Throwback Thursday and Foodie Friday and in the past I've done a Fixer Upper update on Sunday. When I was thinking about what to do on Wednesday, Weight Watchers seemed like a good topic and the timing is good for me. I weigh in and go to the meeting on Saturday, so Wednesday is a good mid-point for me to sort of remember the meeting and reflect on how I think I'm doing this week.

The meeting topic last week might have been about cleaning out your fridge and making it plan friendly, but that's not really what we focused on. One of the things I really like about our current  but temporary leader Gina, is that she starts the meeting like she is chatting with us and then lets the conversation and discussion go where it goes. She always touches on the topic of the week, but a lot of times, people get way more engaged in the discussion and build on things that others say. It creates a very warm and friendly atmosphere. We clap and cry and laugh and it's a pretty great way to start the WW week for me. Generally I don't say very much. I like to listen and try to get inspired.

At the last meeting Gina encouraged us to write down what we took away from the meeting. I had four things:

One of the ladies called the smaller ladies at the pool she goes to "the scrawnies"


Several of the people were trying to re-engage with their WW plan, which is where I am/was
Vita Tops are 4 Smart Points
Gina's outfit was ridiculously cute and how does she wear those high heels?



I know all of these things seem random but it has helped me remember the meeting and by simply remembering the meeting, I remember Weight Watchers and I remember that I want to follow the plan and lose some weight. It's a process.


Lately I have been struggling with motivation. When I very joined WW back in 2008, I was sick of myself and the way I looked and felt. I wanted to be done being the fat chick in the group. My motivation and my measuring stick was that T could not put his arms all the way around my waist when he hugged me (he was 10 and small). I loved losing the inches and the weight and measuring by hugs how close I was to achieving the goal of getting those little arms around me. I set my weight loss goal for 100 pounds. I didn't get there, but I was pretty close; at my lowest weight I was down 81 lbs.


Then I got cocky and thought I could do it myself. I quit paying and attending meetings. I half-heartedly kept at the plan - the eating and the exercising - but the weight crept back on. Then I had that knee joint replacement surgery and the exercising part went away and so did the watching what I ate. I didn't gain back all 80 pounds, but I was heading that way, so I joined WW again a couple of years ago. Since then I've lost about 20 lbs but it has been a rough go. I don't exercise like I did the first time around. I'm not as militant and ferocious about what I eat. T is big now and has long arms that easily wrap around me, so I lost my measuring stick and though I want to lose weight, I lack the necessary motivation, so I've really been thinking a lot about a way to persuade myself that WW is a good idea.


I think I figured it out.


You know I turned 50 on Sunday. I used to think 50 was OLD, but now that I am 50, I don't think that anymore!  I do think old is around the corner and up the road though. I want to be one of those ladies where you look at them and you can't quite figure out how old they are. They look fit and like they have their act together. I want to be active and have a little muscle tone and some trim to my body. I want to walk on my own power and since I have this crappy arthritis, I need to take care of my knees and relieve some of the pressure on them that is due to the weight.


I'm pretty sure that my weight will always be a struggle for me. I have to be conscious of what I eat all the time. I have to tell myself to break a sweat every day, or at least most days. I believe it's worth it though. I think this time around it's less about what I want and more about what I don't want. I don't want to be on medications. I don't want my doctor to look at me and tell me, "You've got to drop some weight." I would much rather hear him say, "Wow! You have lost some weight. Good for you!"


Anyway...this post turned out to be a lot longer and much more like a therapy session than I expected. That's okay. I guess it's been on my mind a lot these past few days and out it came, right here on the screen.


I do feel pretty good about how it's been going this week. I've been conscientious about what I'm eating (even with that rum cake in the fridge!). I've been planning my meals and tracking what I eat. I'm getting in some activity: I went to the gym on Monday for a good cycling session and yesterday I walked all around Red Butte Garden. Today I haven't done anything. I guess I'll call it a rest day. 


Speaking of rest, I need to get better at going to bed much closer to 10 than to 11. I blame day light savings time. It doesn't get dark here until almost 9:30, so if I'm out and about, I lose track of time. Last night it was after 9 when I got home and I was excited about the photos I took and had to download them and then it was 11:30. Brutal to have the sky get light around 5:30 in the morning and my alarm tell me to get up. Summer time. I love it but it wears me out.

#1621 throwback Thursday reality check

I was looking through old pics for something to post today and I came across this photo of T, myself and my aunt Mia from April 2005.

HOLY SHIT! I WAS HUGE!!

I spent several minutes thinking about if I wanted to post this photo here. I obviously decided I would post it. It's important for me to remember and acknowledge that time. I should print this out and carry it around with me. I could pull the photo out and look at it whenever I think that watching what I eat and taking the time to go for a walk or go to the gym is too much trouble.  I could pull the photo out and look at it whenever I feel sad or depressed to remind me how far I have come. I could look at it to remind myself that I can never, ever go back to that version of myself.

And to think that it would take me three more years before I helped myself by joining Weight Watchers.


Damn.

T and Mia look cute and the flowers are pretty.

#1599 well put-together ladies

When I was on vacation in Barcelona with my mom and my sister, we had the chance to do a lot of people-watching. It's one of my favorite things, when I think about it. I like to see the way people dress and behave and react to their experiences.

One thing that Lizzie and I noticed and admired was what we called "well put-together" ladies. There were many Spanish women who looked so effortlessly stylish that I spent most of the two weeks feeling more frumpy than I usually do. From the hair to the makeup to the accessories to the shoes to the clothing itself, I admired the style.

An close-to-home example: my mom has a cousin, Ferran, who has a daughter named Gloria. We met Gloria at her parent's home when we went to lunch there to celebrate Ferran's wife's saint day. (Sometimes people are named after saints and the saints have a day and then that's your saint day, too.) Gloria was wearing a navy blue sweater with sleeves to the elbow and a navy blue skirt with a floral pattern. I don't specifically remember her shoes, but I think they were a low-heeled pump. Her hair and makeup were clean-looking, nothing fancy or overdone. She was wearing a simple pendant on a chain and earrings along with her wedding ring. I specifically remember Lizzie and I looking Gloria and then at each other and saying, "Well put-together Spanish lady."

Another example: Lizzie and I were on the train coming back to Barcelona from Montserrat. A young couple sat in the in the seats across from ours. The woman was wearing a sun dress with a denim jacket and a scarf around her neck. Her hair was just above her shoulder and curly. Her make-up was minimal, probably just some mascara and maybe a bit of lipstick. Her shoes were ballet flats. She was wearing cute dangling earrings. She looked great!

In two weeks, I saw dozens of examples of well-put together ladies. It was inspiring.

Then I came home and although I would like to be a well put-together lady, I find myself lacking.

I looked for more well put together ladies when I was on the cruise. I saw some, but I also saw a lot of women that looked like they were trying really hard and the result was not natural and elegant. Too much makeup, too much jewelry, the clothes didn't fit properly...it's just my opinion of course. The thing is that I'm looking for my own style and looking for what I think works well for others that I might incorporate.

Having style doesn't come naturally to me. I've always dressed more for comfort than for style. I haven't mastered the balance between comfort and style. I wrote earlier in the week about my problem with shoes. It doesn't stop there. I don't really love to shop so I get in a rut. When I do shop, it takes time because you have to try clothes on. Not all clothes are the same sizing. A pair of pants in one shop might be the same size as the pants in another shop, but they don't fit the body the same way at all. It can be so discouraging.

I didn't really make any resolutions for myself this year, but I do have some goals. (I guess goals and resolutions are the same thing, but goals sound better to me.) I aspire to be well put-together. I have a lot of work to do to achieve this goal. I frankly don't know if I will ever achieve it because I am basically pretty lazy. Like today, for example, I could have dressed better. I went to WW to weigh in (up 0.4 lbs GRRR). I wore my usual weigh-in outfit of track pants and a t-shirt. It was cold so I put on an old oversized fleece jacket with a little bit of paint on the wrist. I had an appointment at the hairdresser after the WW meeting. I could have come home to change, but I didn't. I went to get my hair cut (feels and looks a lot better!) then I actually went to the store with my cute hair and my weigh-in clothes. Not a good look! Not put-together! Yes, I was comfortable but I was not putting my best self forward. I was bummed out when I thought about it. I can do better than that. I want to do better than that. I will do better than that.

The whole style thing has been on my mind for awhile and it just seemed like the right time to get it out there. Now that I've said to my seven readers on the world wide interwebs, it's out there and I need to hold myself accountable and reach my goal.

I'll let you know how it's going.

#1177 obsessed with messy buns

Over the past couple of days, I have become obsessed with buns.

I don't know what you are thinking about.

I'm talking about hair.

What did you think?

My hair isn't that long, but it's not that short either. It's pretty much right in between, but I googled buns for medium hair and there are videos that show/tell you how to do it. I watched one video several times and I have to admit I didn't know what the hell the girl was trying to tell me. I understood the words, but when I tried to do it, my hair didn't look anything like hers.

My friend Nicole has the most lovely hair. The color, the length, the thickness, the shiny-ness...it's just beautiful. Her hair is long and she wears it in lots of different ways. I blame her for the obsession I have with buns. Her hair looks so cute when she puts it up in various bun configurations.

I don't much skill in the hair department. It's like I missed out on the girl genes necessary to know what the heck to do with hair. When I was younger, I wanted to have hair like Dorothy Hamill. Do you remember her? The U.S. Olympic figure skater? She had awesome hair.

I begged my mom to let me get my hair cut like Dorothy's. She told me it would look terrible on me, but I insisted. Guess what it looked terrible.

Yep, that's me in 1976 with my Dorothy Hamill haircut and my Laverne, Shirley and Fonzie poster. Lizzie is an adorable 5 year old. That little black poodle is Tippi and I think I got that big red stuffed animal at the fair that year.

Oh sure, I was adorable, but the hair wasn't good. My hair had lots more wave to it than Dorothy's, so it didn't do that cool thing hers did when she spun around during her skating.

So cool!! Sadly, that wedge haircut did not work out for me, but it wasn't for lack of trying.

Anyway, the point of this story is that now my hair is a bit longer and I want to learn how to make a "messy bun".

I suppose like anything else, it will take trying and failing and trying again and again until I get it figured out. Wish me luck! And if you have any helpful tips, please comment. :)

#1172 I thought I was going to write about my new shoes but...

Make-up and shoes. Those are two things you can buy that will always fit. I'd like to add jewelry to that list. Earrings always fit, usually better than shoes.

This morning I was feeling blue because at my WW weigh-in this morning, I gained back that stupid 1.6 lbs that I dropped off last week. GRRR. I'm a yo-yo. The really pathetic thing is that I KNOW when I'm making bad food choices, but I can't seem to stop myself.

When I got home from WW, I had a good long chat with myself about making better choices. I reflected on what were some things that contributed to my weight loss success in the past and asked myself if I had the fortitude to step up and do those things again. I asked myself if I felt better/happier/stronger/healthier when I was like this:

me in 2008 (in the Dominican Republic)

or like this:

me in 2010 (in Barbados)

While I know that I am fabulous no matter what my weight is, (that's what you're supposed to tell yourself, right?) I'm telling you straight up that I felt a lot more confident and healthier in 2010 than in 2008. My self-esteem has taken a plunge in the past couple of years as I have put weight back on.

Last year in particular, I found myself to be very unhappy. I kind of gave up on myself. I didn't even try to look my best because I didn't feel like my best was good enough. My work suffered, my family suffered and I suffered because I wasn't happy with myself. I won't go through that again.

Whoa. This is not where I was expecting this post to go! I just meant to tell you about the new shoes I bought today. Guess I'm in my head way more than I thought.

Send some kind thoughts and good vibes my way, please friends, as I continue to struggle with my weight loss demons. :) 

#1119 uppin' my style game

We have been having remarkably lovely weather over the past few days. The temperatures have been in the high 50s to mid 60s - very un-February like for us, but totally appreciated! I haven't really been out to enjoy the nice temperatures, but I like the sunshine!

The only problem is that I don't know what to wear. I'm sure we are not quite done with winter (in fact, a storm is coming in tomorrow, but only rain, I think) so I don't want to put my sweaters away, but it's that time of year when I am pretty tired of all the sweaters I've been wearing all winter. I think it might be time for a couple of new things to get me through the end of winter and into the early spring.

My BFF LA has been in a clothes buying frenzy over the past couple of weekends. She was telling me that she has put together a clothing shopping list. I think that makes sense. I don't go to the grocery store without a list, so why would I go clothes shopping without a list? She said she decided on some essential pieces that she wanted to have and bought some complementary items to work with those essentials. She's been getting ideas from Pinterest. She said she went on a buying spree last weekend and bought everything on her list. I won't be doing that, but it would be great to pick up a couple of new things.

I've often thought how much better it would be to buy a few new things a month instead of not buying anything for a long time and then going a little crazy. Now nearly two months have passed in this new year and all I've bought is a new pair of shoes. I haven't even worn them yet.

I found a cool post on Pinterest that showed 13 pieces of clothing that could be mixed and matched to make 31 outfits! How cool is that?! Talk about adult Garanimals. (If you don't know or remember Garanimals, it's a children's clothing company where you mix and match different pieces of clothing to make cute outfits.) I'm not going to buy 13 clothing pieces this weekend, I don't think, but there are some good ideas on the site.  Check it out!

from this blog

Makes putting together a cute work outfit look easy, right? Maybe even a lazy, no style girl like me could figure it out with a little help! Of course, am I really going to be able to find cute stuff in my size without breaking the bank and running all over town? Shopping is not my favorite. And there are also my shoe issues. But I really want to work on stepping up my work clothes game a bit this year.

That's what is on my mind today. Talk to you soon!

#1097 MLK day