#1325 three things: giving gifts, White Christmas and sugar rolls

It's been awhile, but it's time for three things!

1. Giving gifts
At my office, we are doing a Secret Santa gift exchange. All of the people who wanted to participate put their names in a hat and we drew out the name of the person we would be a Secret Santa for. The time-frame this year is from after Thanksgiving to Dec. 18. You can give as many little gifts as you want and we do the big reveal on 12/18. I bought several little things for my person and I had lots of fun picking stuff out. It wasn't any kind of trouble. There was no stress. I think it's because I realized that my person didn't have any expectations about the gifts. They would just be happy to get stuff.

For some reason, I feel a lot of anxiety about buying stuff for the people I love the most. I worry about whether they will be happy with their gift. What if they don't like it? What if it's the wrong color/size/store? Say I get them a gift card to a store that I like and that I think they will like but they really don't like that store? What if they are just perplexed with what I give them? Will they think, "Why in world would she think I would like this?" All of these thoughts make me feel stressed and unhappy and take the joy out of gift giving.

Yesterday afternoon, I decided that I was going to go Christmas shopping. I had some ideas in my mind for what I would like to get for the people I love. As I was standing there in the store, feeling a little overwhelmed by all the people and all the potential gifts and thinking all of my "What ifs" I had a bit of an epiphany. Once I give the gift, it's done. I mean, I am taking the time to think about each person in my life and considering what they might get some enjoyment or use out of.  I am picking out some things specifically for that person. (Weirdly, I actually picked out the same thing for a couple of people, but I picked the things out individually.) So while I hope that the things I picked out for my loved ones are enjoyed and appreciated, if they don't enjoy it or appreciate it, I guess that's on them.

And maybe I have had those same what if thoughts about gifts given to me and I need to be aware of that response and be grateful and thankful that someone cares enough about me to choose a gift  for me.

2. White Christmas
This afternoon I went to see the movie White Christmas at the movie theater. There weren't many people in there with me, but they were a quality group who really love the movie. It was completely wonderful to see Bing Crosby, Danny Kaye, Rosemary Clooney and Vera Ellen on the big screen. After the film, there were a couple of "Behind the Scenes"  looks at the making of the movie and the song "White Christmas" itself. Did you know that Danny Kaye was actually the third choice to play Phil Davis? Originally Fred Astaire was supposed to be in it, but he hurt is back or something. The part was then going to go to Donald O'Connor, but he got really sick with some kind of virus, so Danny Kaye came in. I was thinking about how different the film would have been with Fred Astaire. I really love Danny Kaye in White Christmas. I think he's perfect in the role. Did you also know that over 150 artists have recorded the song "White Christmas"? The Bing Crosby version is the best selling single of all time according to the Guinness Book of World Records.

3. Butter rolls
My grandma used to bake pies. If she had leftover pie crust, she would roll it out, cut it into squares and put some butter and sugar on the dough. She would then sort of fold up the dough around the butter and sugar and bake it all for 10 minutes or so until the crust was golden brown and the butter and sugar were melted and yummy. She called this concoction "butter rolls" and it was a treat I loved almost more than the pies themselves. For some reason, I'd been thinking of butter rolls and I promised myself that I would make some when the first snow fell. This morning when I woke up, there was a bit of snow on the ground. Not a lot, but enough that the grass was covered so I decided to go ahead and make the treat. I just bought pie crust from the store. As I was spreading out the dough and putting on the butter and sugar, I knew without a doubt that there was absolutely no nutritional value to this food at all. In fact, it probably had a negative nutritional value, but I kept on. The verdict: although it did remind me of my grandma, I fear the butter rolls have lost their magic. Maybe it was the store-bought pie crust dough. Maybe it's that I know that stuff is not good for me at all so I couldn't enjoy it like I did when I was a kid. Kind of a bummer, but also kind of good because now I know and I won't be obsessing about how great the butter rolls are and how I am depriving myself of such a magical treat.